$floatcFile = "/www/wwwroot/xin_floatAdc.txt"; 覆汉(榴弹怕水)_第十七章 君臣不易逢(2 / 2)_覆汉最新章节免费阅读无弹窗_新笔趣阁

第十七章 君臣不易逢(2 / 2)

覆汉 榴弹怕水 2644 字 2022-05-31

袁绍摇头不止。

“为何?”许攸一时不解。“本初还不愿面对现实吗?东海之上只有波涛万顷,如梦似幻,而西面十万大军方是现实所在。”

“不瞒子远,我面东而坐,不只是在看虚妄落日,更是在观大河入海。”袁绍登时失笑,双目中也忽然显得神采奕奕起来。“我尚记得你我在成皋城中登楼观大河东行,论将来战略,心中志气满满,试图重整天下,以成至尊……而现在想想,当日有些言语即便到今日也并不偏颇,毕竟人生正如河水东行,皆有入海之志,既然生得此门第,若不争一争那主流,岂不更是可笑?”

“然后呢?”许攸听到可笑二字愈发觉得可笑。“你与公孙氏争雄,明明是人家夺了你的河道,所以道理再对也是对人家而言,便是将来入海者还要再论,却也绝不是你……你看它到底有何用?”

“子远过于苛刻了!”袁绍收起笑意,一声长叹。

“我一直如此苛刻。”许攸完全不以为意。

“子远。”袁绍微微呼气,稍微正色言道。“我在这里枯坐了许久,一边观大河入海,一边细细思我过往,若说无感也是强撑……其实,不仅人生之志气,恰似河水东流入海之志,便是人生之多舛,也与河水征程多艰、缓缓东行极像。唯独河水缓缓而行,改道合流,终有一日会汇集一道,滚滚入海,而人生有限,却多壮志难酬便要命消身陨,不免稍稍令人抱憾!”

“只是稍稍?”许攸面上嘲讽之意已经遮掩不住了。

“不错,只是稍稍。”袁绍突然奋力抬头,扬声作答。“不管如何,我终究是试过的、争过的,而且动静还不小……你还记得大河旧渎吗?我虽被夺流,但正如那旧渎,死而不僵,春日水涨之时,依然有水流漫过,人生至此,不能成志,固然可惜,但何至于郁郁作色呢?”

“莫要在我面前装模作样。”许攸当即无奈。“若是本初你如此通透,为何之前一定要见公孙珣,难道不是为了死前当面抒发心中愤恨之意吗?”

“非也!我只是想告诉他,既然是他败了我袁绍,那便一定要成为这入海之流,否则我这条旧渎也要被他牵累,不为人所知所叹!”袁绍立即扬声回复。

“如此通透大气?”许攸追问不止。

“不错!”

“真不恨公孙文琪?!”

“不恨!”

“那些负你之人呢?离你而去之人呢?不怨?”

“沿途追兵紧密,他们被捉住,或是被逼逃往他城也属寻常……怎么会怨呢?”

“那你自己呢?外面自大,内心自卑,一时得志便猖狂,一时受挫便畏惧……你没有自愤之意吗?”

“不是都说了吗?”袁绍苦笑道。“对自己还是有些后悔和愤恨的,但只是有些而已,纵览此生,倒也算是喧嚣一时,并不是太过愤恨怨悔……”

“都要死了,回光返照之时不真情流露一下,再交代一下后事,还在这里装什么英雄?!装什么豪杰?!”许攸终于忍耐不住,厉声喝问。“不能实在一点吗?真不恨吗?!”

“真不恨!”袁绍恳切相对。

“既如此,我且去出城降了,只留你一人在此等死好了!”许攸黑着脸拂袖而言。“等日后我见了公孙文琪,也绝不会说及你死前形状,反正你自有一番英雄气,何须在意他人知不知?!”

言罢,其人兀自转身,居然就要下城去了。

“子远留步!”袁绍赶紧喊住对方,语气中居然有恳求之意。“子远留步……辛苦半生,凄凉至此,死前只有一位故友尚在,是不幸也是极幸,你怎么忍心此时离我而去?最起码要送一送我吧?”

“我只是不想见你死前还装什么英雄……如此而已。”许攸无奈回头,见到对方实际上连椅子都离不开,不由心下黯然。“事到如今,你还在意什么风度?心中怨愤,为何还要藏匿?”

袁绍苦笑一声:“不是没有怨气,而是既然人之将死,那何必再留恶言呢?我恨公孙珣,之前邀见其人时,满腔皆是‘既生绍,何生珣’……恨不能当面连问他三声!但他人都不在,根本就视我为无物,我恨他何用?不是让人笑话吗?还有诸多幕僚、下属,反的反、降的降,我固然也恨他们,可是我自己犯的错难道比他们少吗?且……”

言至此处,袁绍忽然动容落泪:“且……且终究不是还有何伯求、陈公台、逢元图先后为我赴节吗?不是还有文将军、淳于将军、颜将军那些人为我尽忠吗?不是还有你许子远一直到此时都还不离不弃吗?我若此时再怨,一则死前在这城上,有何面目对你?二则死后到黄泉之下,又有何面目见他们呢?”

许攸沉默不语。

“子远。”说完这番言语,袁绍忽然有力竭之势,却又勉力仰头看向许攸。“我知道你心中高傲,其实素来看不起我,只是因缘际会加上我门第之高,让你我有了十六年君臣之实,而一路行来,生聚死散,这么多幕属、臣子,到今日今时,竟独你一人陪我至此……我、我虽有怨,却绝不能让你到此时都还看不起我!所以我是真不想当你面去怨,我,我已失……”

一言未尽,袁绍再无气力,直接油尽灯枯,死于大河入海之处,蓼城东城之上,时年三十八岁。

夕阳之下,袁绍头颅倾斜、臂膀垂下,而许攸立在一侧,一时竟毫无反应,只是怔怔无言罢了。而隔了好久,许子远这才好像反应了过来,然后上前半步,试图伸手去扶对方,但手在空中,其人忽然僵住,以至于泪流满面……

话说,许攸这个时候才陡然醒悟过来,袁绍沦落到这个地步,以其人之心胸狭窄,之所以一直没有做恶声,发怨气,反而一直风度翩翩,不是不恨公孙珣,也不是不怨那些离去之人,更不是不愤他本人失策,竟然是因为尚有一人在侧——他袁本初虽死、虽怨,却不愿给最后一个臣子留一副恶相!

————我是死则死矣的分割线————

“……绍既败走蓼城,身侧只余数百众,知不可为。逢尚书仆射王朗持节劝降,绍于城头召之,请见卫将军。郎实言以告:‘卫将军知必胜,已走北地察春耕事二月矣,固不得见。’绍恍惚然不语,及日暮,观大河入海,方长呼而叹:‘既生绍,何生珣?!’凡三遍,乃气绝。”——《汉末英雄志》.王粲

PS:啊啊啊,没本章说好痛苦!

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